Because boy was that embarrassing. No. It really was.
Also, I could use some help remembering to let the poor ‘ol Rudi dog in after I let her out right before bedtime.
Why’dya have to go and leave me outside all alone like that? You hurt my feelings, momma.
Thank heavens the weather was nice and she mustered up the energy to bark—which she doesn’t do often. I mean, like that was the first time she has barked in 3 months—since the last time I left her out. I made it up to her with bacon. And a side of bacon.
I’m not ashamed to admit it. I need help. I could use some hand holding. And a lot of hugging. In fact, just hold me ’til it’s all over.
I know that means for like the next 50 years or so, but if you all pitched in, right?
Because it’s all closing in.
FAST. Like ZOINKS. It has occurred to me that perhaps the kids have been watching way too many episodes of Scooby-Doo.
It has taken us 6 years to build up immunity to this crazy place we call our life and about to embark upon a whole new kind of chaos, dangling on the cusp of a 2nd dimension kind of crazy.
Yesterday, my man suggested I download the Ozzy song “Crazy Train.” He takes good care of me, that man.
Here is a short list of where our crazy train is stopping:
~The teenager starts her senior year of high school tomorrow.
~The triplets meet their individual kindergarten teachers tomorrow.
~Then on Thursday, I have to put all three of them on the big yellow bus. And then seek therapy for my complex emotions of joy and sorrow.
~I start back to college next Monday. Where I expect to cover 12.35 extra unnecessary miles getting lost because I can’t read maps. Even right side up.
My mind is reeling. I can’t focus. I can’t recite the alphabet. Except in Chinese—but I don’t speak Chinese. So this has been confusing. And unsettling
I can’t be trusted to remember the very most simple basic things the make up my every day life.
Such as checking email. Even though it’s right at my finger tips. If you are one of the 264 messages I have yet to read, please forgive me. Try sending it in Chinese.
Or take my Cherry Coke Zero out of the freezer before it turns into an 8 ounce tin can of solid cherry goodness that I can’t enjoy because I haven’t figured out how to drink liquid frozen mass.
My lips are rough, flakey and dry…
because I can’t even remember to keep up with my chapstick application despite having a new delightfully organic chapstick that Wild Banshee’s husband gave me.
Hydration, you say? What hydration?
Faaahhh–ghhhheta ’bout it. If I can’t remember to let the dog back in, check my email, take my Cherry Coke Zero out of the freezer before it solidifies, or reapply my much needed chapstick, we all know I am not staying hydrated. And who really knows how many other incredibly important things I am failing to remember. Well, I bet Confucius knows.
Which is a vicious cycle because dehydration decreases my efficiency and increases my tendency to forget simple basic tasks.
Like for example: What was the purpose of this blog post, again? I seem to have forgotten.
~The Grasshoppa
Tweet//
{ 2 trackbacks }
{ 19 comments… read them below or add one }
Since it has been approximately three weeks (or more) since I have shaved my legs, I don’t think I’m a good candidate for this reminding post. (I’m sure you really wanted to know that about my legs. What I have going for me is that after you read this comment you will promptly forget, and not think badly of me.)
My email inbox right now….scary!! I don’t even want to think about it.
[Reply]
Bet you I won’t forget. I remember all the stuff I don’t need to—just nothing that I should. It’s all backward.
[Reply]
I guess you should have a big alarm to keep you reminded about hydration. I know they breakfast is the most important meal of the day, and for food that is true. It is even more important that you drink a glass of water in your first 30 minutes of the day. It will set everything else on the right path.
[Reply]
Your chapstick is 82% organic? Seriously? They have to round up or down there. 82%? This comment is 82% serious.
[Reply]
Wowie Kazowie! I’ve left my sodas in the freezer before too! Quite a few times actually – although none really recently. When they explode in there, it’s really bad news.
[Reply]
Well, the bright side is…there will be peace in the land when school starts, which will give you time to check emails, drink coke zero while lounging on the couch and checking said emails and printing out directions from mapquest for college…which is really exciting, by the way…and staying hydrated. Oh, apply chapstick while driving to school, just don’t check emails while driving to school.
[Reply]
What you need is….well….a wife. Maybe Ineed a wife too….I cant remember the last time I remembered something at the right time. LOL. Btw…monkey wants to say hi /;’
/
[Reply]
I have to be honest, your hairy arm pits don’t bother me. As long as I can’t see them or smell them it’s not a problem for me. PS Sometimes I forget to shave my pits too. Please don’t look or smell!
[Reply]
Shave? how do you even manage a shower? I can’t with just the one!
New follower!
[Reply]
Hydration at breakfast time would be a lot easier for me if Dunkin Donuts delivered!!
[Reply]
I am 82% certain I had not even noticed that!!!! Then again, I am dehydrated, so it stands to reason.
[Reply]
Well, thank goodness I am not the only person that puts soda in the freezer. Every one else acts like I am a freak.
[Reply]
Hiiiiiiiii Monkey.
Go help mommy find a wife
[Reply]
Your secret is safe with me. And the 2 other people that read this blog
[Reply]
Well, lets see—-first I line them all up on the bathroom floor. Then I take a huge strip of ducttape—–like 6-8 feet long—-then I bound their feet……
KIDDING.
I take 3.4 minute showers. If I have to shave I give myself an extra 42 seconds—which is why I have a lot of missed areas
[Reply]
Hairy armpits, hairy legs…this is me on a weekly basis. Shower? Oh yeah, sometimes I forget to do that too!
[Reply]
My thoughts are with ya today.
D
[Reply]
THANKS!! My email has been broke so I missed this comment. Sorry
[Reply]
lmbo I may shave onve every month and you expect me to remind you bwhahaha.. I get dehydrated cause I only drink coffee.. if I don’t I will be a zombie lol. Seriously it is my get up and go
[Reply]